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Four tips to reduce conflict in your divorce

On Behalf of | Jul 11, 2024 | Divorce |

Are you conflict averse? If so, then you’re probably cringing at the thought of fighting with your spouse throughout the divorce process.

That tension might leave you wanting a quick out of the marriage dissolution process, but that can be a dangerous approach to take. After all, settling your divorce too quickly could result in giving in to your spouse’s demands, which might leave you at a disadvantage when it comes to key legal issues like property division, spousal support, and child custody. Remember, your future is on the line here. You don’t want to put yourself in a bad position just because you don’t want to deal with your spouse.

And there are ways to manage the conflict in your divorce. Let’s look at some steps that you might be able to take in your case to reduce the friction and make it easier for you to engage in the process. That way you can properly advocate for your interests.

Tips for reducing conflict in your divorce

While there are several steps you can take to ease the tension in your divorce, the exact approach you take will depend on the facts and the dynamics in play in your marriage dissolution. With that in mind, here are some tips that you might want to consider implementing:

  • Communicate in writing: If there’s a power imbalance in your relationship with your spouse or you simply can’t talk to them without the conversation spinning out of control, then it’s probably best to only communicate in writing. By doing so, you retain more control over what you say and your response, since you won’t be tempted to shut down or react out of emotion. Reducing everything to writing also leaves a paper trail so that there’s no confusion over what’s been said.
  • Pick your battles: You can easily become overwhelmed by the divorce process when you think about fighting over every little issue. But you don’t have to battle your spouse over everything. In fact, letting them “win” on some issues can buy you goodwill and give you leverage to tackle the issues that are most important to you. So, before heading into your divorce, know your priorities so that you can focus on them without getting tangled in the weeds of your divorce.
  • Take care of yourself: You need an outlet during your divorce. Support might be available from family members and friends, or you may want to find a support group or therapist. Find the support that you need and take care of yourself by getting plenty of rest, eating healthily, and taking up hobbies that reduce your stress and give you a sense of joy.
  • Strike the right tone: As you navigate your divorce, you need to focus on the future. Dragging up harmful events from the past won’t be helpful and will instead lead to more conflict. Be assertive but respectful but do your best to find common ground.

Don’t let your spouse take control of your divorce

You might be tempted to let your spouse take the steering wheel in your divorce, but doing so could put you on the losing end of the process. To position yourself for success in your divorce, and to protect your future, a well-developed divorce strategy is necessary. So, before proceeding with your marriage dissolution, make sure you have a firm understanding of what you hope to get out of the process and how to achieve the goals that you’ve laid out for yourself.